Stop with the negativity.

This is an appropriate follow-up to Monday's post. It's only fair that since I blasted all the starry-eyed dreamers that I should also poke a stick at the Negative Nancys and Debbie Downers of the world (or those on the periphery of my social acquaintance). Please note that this isn't about people with serious problems. I'm talking about the whiners.

"UGH, not again!"

"Wish I had someone to talk to..."

"OMG my boss is the most annoying jerk ever!"

"Well, guess I'm alone again."

"Wish things could go right just once."

Good gracious. What is it? What's happened? Is it really that bad? 

If it really is that bad, my condolences. Get thee to a best friend, a counselor, or religious adviser, and best of luck jumping this hurdle. 

But what's that you say? Goodness me, you got a speeding ticket. Third time this year? Hmm. I'm so sorry to hear about your troubles. Were you speeding? Yes? And you still don't think you should have been pulled over for going 47 in a 30? Yeah, yeah, it's totally unfair, though I don't think they're out to get you. I'm sure of it, yes. I do hope you are able to move beyond this, and the hit to your insurance.

You need someone to talk to? What's wrong? I can't tell because of your cryptic facebook post. Twenty people have just responded asking, "What's wrong?!" and "Oh no, girl! You know you can always talk to me!" and "Whose ass do I need to kick?!" You haven't responded to any of them. Perhaps one of those people would be able to lend an ear allowing you to unload your mystery burden.

Oh dear, your boss is just a real annoying so-and-so. No, you're right, no one has it as bad as you do. I think all those under- and unemployeed folks out there are pretty glad they don't have to deal with your boss' annoying whistling and the way he thunders down the hallways every day. If people only knew how hard it is for you.

Life's getting in your way again, you say? How awful. What happened? Oh, you stubbed your toe? Yes, that does hurt a lot. Is there anything I can do? Put your toe in a splint and drive you to work for the next 3 weeks? Start a charity in your name? I sure do hope you recover!

There, there, I know it's hard. The end of a relationship is really tough. How long have you been together? Oh, 6 weeks. Poor darling, it'll be okay. Oh--of course, no, you're right; I'm sure I wouldn't understand what you're feeling. At least you had love in your life, unlike, apparently, me.


Let's get all serious and slightly preachy here for a minute. After a little shakeup in my life when I was feeling down, I was at church one Sunday when the preacher told a story of some Nazi concentration camp prisoners who managed to smuggle in a Bible which the guards never found. Their tent was so terribly infested with fleas that the guards skipped searching it so they wouldn't have to enter it themselves. One prisoner told another who'd been complaining of the fleas to be thankful for them, because without the fleas, they wouldn't be able to keep their Bible with them, and keep up their emotional strength.

The point of the sermon was to be thankful, even for the things that seem like problems. To use the commonly bandied about phrase, it taught me to adopt an "attitude of gratitude". If you can learn to somehow see the good in the bad, to be "thankful for the fleas", everything else is just that much better. I suggest we all start small. Maybe you're feeling grouchy at work, but at least you have a job. Maybe you wish you could afford to buy more clothes right now, but at least you have clothes that are still in good shape and keep you covered and warm. Maybe you're stuck inside, but you have a beautiful view of a gorgeous day from your window. You don't have a window? Then you don't have to look at those gray, rainy days. You'll find that once you start finding things to be thankful or grateful for, you find more and more.

And then, just maybe, if you can do that, we can all stop listening to how you just had "the worst day ever!!!! :(" because you fell down in front of everyone in the Target parking lot and skinned your hands. Buck up, champ! You'll live!