I need to whine a minute. Thanks for listening.

How have things been the first chunk of my pregnancy? Oh, just fine! No morning sickness. No nausea. Generally feeling great.

Eventually something's going to happen, right?

Well my "thing" is clearly the gestational diabetes. But not even really that. It's the FIVE HUNDRED MILLION THOUSAND DOCTORS APPOINTMENTS.

Here's a letter I received (not really, just play along):

Hey Becs, you gots ya some 'betis! So much for a smooth-sailing pregnancy!

So here's what I'm going to need you to do.

1. Go to a meeting that lasts 3 hours to learn how Crystal Light is okay to drink, and Equal is fine, but stevia is not. And no one mentions how fiber in certain foods affects the body's absorption of carbs. "A carb is a carb." Then learn about how you get to prick your finger 4 fun-filled times a day to check your blood sugar.

(See Wilford? I told you I would check my blood sugar, and check it often.)

You're going to write down each blood glucose reading. And you're going to write down EVERY morsel that passes your lips.

You're going to the be reason your husband's mom doesn't bake him a birthday cake, 'cause he didn't want to bring cake home that he couldn't share with you. (You ol' diabetic broad you! What a swell guy you've got!)

And then you're going to come back to the diabetes center in a week. And then 2 weeks after that. And then 2 weeks after that... You get the idea.

2. And while you're doing that, it's also time for you to start going to your regular baby doctor every two weeks. But since you have gestational diabetes, and you want to make sure your baby isn't getting too big ('cause then they may have to slice you open since your hips are as shapely as a 12-year-old boy's), you're also going to go to another doctor's office every so often, too! And they'll keep a close eye on the size of the baby with sonograms. (Gotta go there so insurance covers the extra sonograms.)

3. Plus you need to go to the dentist.

4. Plus you need to work in a hair cut before the girl who has been cutting your hair for the last decade goes on maternity leave herself. Because you're scared for anyone else to cut your hair.

5. And you scheduled an office party that you're in charge of putting together during a week that you now have 3 appointments. One of them on the day of the party. You may be late for your own party.

6. Plus you need to schedule a time to cry.

7. And sneak candy.

8. And buy car seats.

9. And never sleep again.

Love,
Gestational Diabetes


So, that's how I'm feeling at the moment. Yes, I'm whining. Yes, these problems are small potatoes. But I just needed a moment to vent.

Patrick, reminding me that this won't last forever, said, "Honey, you're a non-diabetic diabetic. Such is life."
I replied, "I won't die a 'betic. It's only temporary. (Hehe-get it?)"

The hallmark sign of a good joke? Immediately asking your audience if they get it. Winning.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm about to voluntarily stab myself in the finger for the 3rd time today.

Blood droplets and limited carbs to you and yours,
xo